Stop being so strong

stop being so strong

 I’ve grown into a strong woman.  Yes Sireee!

Even as a deceptively fragile-looking kid, I was referred to as a survivor, a tough little cookie, the one who could brave the wildest storm.

And so it was.

I held tight to my survival instincts and robustness, so much that I wore that strength like a shiny Girl Guide badge.  Solid. Well polished.

As time unfolds though you get to the stage where you have been wearing that badge for such a long time, that it has become more of a shield.

And that’s the crux isn’t it?  The meat and potatoes. The core of the core.


Being so strong because you HAVE to, because that is who you are, and who you have always been.

Being strong because you are the one that everyone else looks to in times of turmoil.

Being the one who looks like they have it all together, to the extent that those closest to you, can never see your pain or your messy truth.

You wonder how how many conversations you can have with someone where they fail to ask you, how you are, how you REALLY are.  (It’s at least 23.  Maybe more).

You think it’s because they don’t care. They are self-absorbed.  They just don’t see you.

But the harsh truth is that it’s because you have been hustling, all your life.  Working hard at being self-sufficient.  Washing that hair with your self-empowerment shampoo!

The result?  Very few people see through the facade – and even if they do – will you let them in?  Will you stand in the wide open space of vulnerability?

Not too often.

Because you are too busy, being so strong that you keep other people from being able to get in and love you, and support you.

So, enough already. Stop being so strong.  Just for today. Or just for one moment.

When you are being THAT strong my love, it’s not self-empowerment. It’s self-shielding.

Because you are afraid to be loved, and to trust love.  Afraid to show your imperfections and raw vulnerability.

So….just watch that, beautiful strong woman.

Yes, you are powerful. You are glorious.

But have the courage to take off that badge and lower that shield every now and then.

Because frankly,

“Being weak doesn’t make you worthless. Being strong doesn’t make you invincible. But having those two sides makes you, you.”- Danielle Baker

Big love,


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