One of the things that changed for me when I became a mum was the growing awareness that life was not as exciting anymore.
With three kids born in the same amount of years, I had become reliant on routine.
A certain amount of predictability kept me sane and organized – or at the very least, gave the impression there was a method to our madness.
The kidlets seemed to understand that there was a rhythm to each day. They enjoyed the fact that they could anticipate a story before bedtime, or some fruit before lunch.
It was comforting and it worked for us.
The downside of any routine-based existence is the pervasive smell of groundhogs day, with a slight tinge of mundane.
No sharing of crazy weekend stories by the coffee machine, no spontaneous trips away and a huge impediment to anyone with a roaming spirit!
Even now, as a solopreneur, there are no work staff parties to look forward to, no unexpected pay rises, and no meetings that I have not either initiated myself, or planned for.
Excitement is an attitude
What I’ve learned from all these changes in life, is that a spirit of excitement and fun is more of an attitude.
It’s the feeling you get when you wake up in the morning and think about the impending day – with positive anticipation, or a sense of dread.
It’s not so much what you have planned, but how you interpret and approach events, that can make all the difference.
It’s up to you to keep your life exciting and fresh!
The day I accepted that my babies were always going to be awake by 5.30am, and that I could either resent the fact, or choose to get up a little earlier and take a few luxurious moments for myself, was the day that my life became my own again.
The day that I realised that the organic process of making friends while at uni, or travelling the world, was hemispheres away from the new terrains afforded in parenthood, was the day that I reclaimed my moxie and discovered new ways of meeting people.
The day I decided that I didn’t need to wait until my kids were older to pursue my passions, was the day that my fear relented – just enough for me to start taking action.
More recently, the moment it dawned on me, that I could actually ASK my husband to give me a little more of what I desired (rather than expecting him to be a mind-ninja) – was the day that our relationship became a little more fun and a whole lot easier!
When life is not exciting, it’s up to you to make it so.
To shake things up a little or change your perspective.
To keep the element of surprise in your relationship, to your partner and yourself
To execute a change of scenery or a sway of plans.
When life is not exciting, all it takes is a determination not to let the relentlessness of parenthood, steer you away from the desires of your heart.
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So well expressed, Kirri. The ‘my life is not exciting anymore’ sentiment is something I am guilty of. The other day without realising I said to my daughter ‘I used to have a life’ (in context of reminiscing over something – not intended to make her feel bad) – but I realised that this wasn’t a great message for her and felt so bad about it. The incident made me realise that I had to change my attitude and MAKE life exciting now. It’s a different kind of excitement, but it’s still good. Very timely that I read this today. So often I come here and experience serendipity.
It is a different kind of excitement for sure Deb – I totally get that.
I consider it my good fortune to have you commenting today and as a reminder for me to check out your latest musings. Serendipitous indeedy!
Absolutely true Kirri. As a pre motherhood traveller and party animal motherhood has felt very mundane and relentless at times.
I have found too the that excitement is in the moment and being in the moment. If we are too involved in running through the to do list in our minds it does seem relentless. Xx
Yup! I’m pretty sure I spent the first two years of parenthood doing exactly that, 80% of the time. I wear mummyhood so much better these days AND its a whole lot of fun.
Thanks for this reminder. I’m still learning this, but learning none the less. I posted a pic and this quote around New Year’s day and I mean to embrace it. “We must stop wishing and simply start building the life we want.” – Tyler Knott Gregson
That’s a beautiful quote Veronica. We’re all still learning
So true Kirri! It is all an attitude. I slid into a big funk when Craig and I returned home after travelling for 5 years. I really resented the new change and felt my life was over.
It took me a long time to realize that I could still approach each day from the eyes of a traveller. Even though I am in a familiar place, i can still look at new ways to explore and discover. Since I chose to live every day as a traveller, no matter if I am on the road or not every mundane day now becomes exciting.
“Approaching each day with the eyes of a traveller” – I’m so stealing that nugget Caz x
fabulous post kirri – so much in life comes down to our attitude doesn’t it. we might not be able to change the situations every time but we can make the most of it.
Ya ha! Not always easy, (especially as a new parent) – but simple enough once you decide to take charge of your life!
Amen – gorgeous girl. Attitude is EVERYTHING! xx
You should know Sonia Sunshine
A lot of that rings a bell with me. I remember getting a baby sitter so we could actually go out for a meal. Getting out of the house seemed like a miracle. Most of what you write here rings true, and your amazing way to see through it and take control of your life and injext some spontaneity into it always impresses. My liitle “bee-stings” as I called them after they moved into teenager years are now the joy of my life, so the early struggles seem more than worth it. Before they where teenagers I used to call them “apple-blossoms” because they were so delicate and beautiful and would hang on daddies every word. That is certainly a distant memory now. Bloody hell, I’ve written far to much. Must be off
No – write more Peter. I get so much value from your words. Your girls are blessed to have a dad like you. I know just how important that is x
Absolutely Kirri! I always love how you always open the curtains when I feel like I’m in a little dark room!